Philip Seymour Hoffman is not George Clooney.

I added a new show to my schedule in August, dear LusiCrabs, and while I knew what I was getting into, I did not really know what I was getting into. Suffice to say that my workload has made an already incredibly exhausting year even more exhausting, although I did not think it possible.

But I open with tales of tests to my character so I can contrast it with how light the last few days have felt for me. I was treated to an exceptional production of Les Misérables on Saturday followed by a wonderful family gathering, then my girlfriend and I followed through on our long-overdue plans to clean our apartment on Sunday and today was actually a calm, manageable today of work without all too much yelling and stressing and feeling like I was working my ass off just so that I could feel like garbage.

Yes, LusiDungeons, that is what constitutes some of the best days of the last few hundred for me. Cleaning and an average workday. The Les Mis thing would have been a stand-out either way. But still, fuck the Year of Luigi. Anyway, I also was able to play some different games this week, so let us talk about that.

Dungeon Village

I received my Nexus 5, and it is as excessively powerful as I hoped. I recently made a decision to stay away from social media until at least the new year, so I decided to load up a few apps on my phone to fill the times at work when I am waiting to be slammed with stuff to do, but do not have the time to do something more productive like read or write. I turned to Kairosoft, makers of Game Dev Story, for a reliable developer that I knew could give me an entertaining and well put together game without the acid rain cloud of microtransactions poisoning the experience.

I know it is well over a year old, but I found out about Dungeon Village for the first time by looking up Kairosoft, and it has been doing exactly the job I hoped it would do. It is breezy, fun, and – refreshingly – not an exercise in greed. I also love the concept of managing a town designed to profit off of typical RPG adventurers. An even smaller test of this occured in Dragon Quest IV and I loved it then too. The RPG is established enough as a genre that riffs like this have the potential to be highly successful. Dungeon Village is not life-changing, but I hope similar concepts continue to be explored.

We will equip you well, brave warrior!

Assassin’s Creed: Revelatioliver Is Stupid

You all remember Oliver Montok, correct? This handsome fellow? I awoke to an earnest text from him the other day that declared Assassin’s Creed: Revelations to have the best mechanics in the series, despite its turgid story. I had given up on the story ages ago, but I still value the series for – at its best – satisfying gameplay and well-stuffed open-world design, especially when the setting is a beautifully realized 16th century Europe, so when I saw the title available for $20 on the PlayStation Store, I decided to give it a download.

To what is likely soon to be a chorus of “I could have told you that”s in the comments, I found Riddles to be wrong. The game is fine. It is worth the green bill, to be sure, as it is closer to Assassin’s Creed II than it is III, but it is hardly an improvement of any kind. It is more of a DLC pack. With a head-scratching tower defense mini-game. Not head-scratching in that it is challenging, but because I have no idea what it is doing in an Assassin’s Creed game. And I am that guy who likes tower defense. Oh well, it is my own fault for not paying attention to the warning signs.

Ask Ethos?

We all joked around about this back during the first phase of this column, but how would it be received if I actually did include a sardonic, yet enthusiastic section in which I addressed questions and comments from the previous article? I suppose I will find out in the comments section of this article, but I want to know noowwwwwww.

Stop Whining Ethos

Seriously.

What About Little King’s Story? Is That Good?

Tell me.

Final Thoughts

I played a little more Tales of Xillia recently and I have new thoughts about how the games in the series consistently lose any thematic focus they may have had by the end of the game, but I would like to dedicate a little more space to that, and I also do not want to talk about the same two games every week. Otherwise, I am hoping for a continued pleasant streak in my life. What about you, LusiMontoks? Let us meet up in the comments and have a jolly old time.

True friends are Paul Giamatti.

This week’s Editorial Miscellany is entitled “Old Friends” because this column has been around for hundreds of years.

Video games and I found each other again this week in both expected and unexpected ways. Indeed, like how old friends can be both an expected comfort and an unexpected thrill, video games both surprised and soothed me in our time together these past seven days. In fact, I am sure that if I could find another way to phrase how long it takes for a week to pass, I could also find more ways to tie in the concept of that harmonious balance found in the very strongest of friends.

There is no way that I am stretching for content to fill the introductory section this week.

No.

Way.

Yes way

What the junk was Introductory Ethan talking about up there? I am glad that everybody is safe with me now, down here in the subtitled sections. How about I for real talk about actual video game stuff now, alright?

Etrian Odyssey Continues To Deliver

The swift release of a remake so soon after an official sequel confuses me, but happily, the magic of Etrian Odyssey remains unharmed. I could not bear to choose the new “story mode”, and I hope it is not a mode enforced on future entries, because the simplicity and grandness of the classic style is what gives the series such incredible weight for me. One of the reasons Ocarina of Time left a powerful mark on me was because of its ability to make exploring a video game fantasy world a complete thrill. The world not only begged to be explored, but had unexpected secrets at every turn, and when I played it as a pre-teen, it had its challenges for me as well. It was the first time a video game became the true adventure I knew it could be.

Etrian Odyssey reconnects me with that feeling. The simple act of drawing a map in a magic forest containing enemies that I know are too powerful for me to face puts me in the boots of a brave adventurer, just naive enough to not know what he is in for. I hope this series continues to thrive.

All sorts of awesome Fire types.

Pro-ké-con X & Y

Believe it or not, the above header believes it is doing a good job explaining that this section is going to talk about what I feel are the pros and cons of Pokémon X & Y. I really am loving the new games. I especially recall the first ten hours in which I felt that familiar exhilaration that new entries consistently bring – one of the remaining few series that is able to do so (the aforementioned Etrian Odyssey being another). I loved the super training, the plethora of Pokémon in every location, and pretty much everything else from the roller skates to the battle scenes.

Now that the euphoria was worn off a bit, I am beginning to reexamine how I feel about the title. I definitely think it is too early to have anything resembling a final opinion, but I am allowing myself to currently feel mixed about some elements. The super training – along with the exp. share – seems to be something of an easy button, which I do not mind in and of itself, but they both assert their presence in a way that encourages their use. Pokémon games were never that difficult, but to take any sense of challenge away from the experience takes away the feeling of adventure. When I reach the Pokémon League and finally crush it, it is because I trained my Pokémon hard to get there, not because I pressed buttons when I was supposed to. That is precisely the reason why I hate Heavy Rain.

I still think I love the abundance of Pokémon, but the series is starting to feel foreign to me in a way that it has not for a long time. This was initially exciting, but I am in the hesitation phase. I strongly feel it will take a replay in a few months time for my thoughts to settle around the new entries.

LEGO Magic

The LEGO games are well known for being charming and fun, albeit simple games that tend to make far better use of popular licenses than their time-of-release counterparts. I had played a Star Wars one a number of years ago on my DS and remembered liking it well enough, so I gladly watched my girlfriend play the first Harry Potter entry a few days ago. It turns out that the second one is pretty cheap on the PlayStation Store, so I started up the download while I hopped on the co-op for her playthrough of the first.

Maybe it was all the Assassin’s Creed III I had played that day, but to play a simple run-around-and-smash-stuff game was near therapeutic. I love complicated menus and heavy themes, but sometimes my heart craves nothing more than to just sit back and play a video game. Just a game. Just fun. Simple. It was the beautiful cabin by a lake of my video game world. A place to just relax and forget about everything else for just a few moments. It seems strange to say, but I sometimes forget that games can be fun.

Closing Thoughts

That is it, folks! I know I skipped the gossip and letters section this week, but video games were too busy trying to rekindle their friendship with me – and I was too busy accepting – for me to ignore their impact. So this edition is dedicated to old friends. The ones who comfort you, the ones who surprise you, and the ones you have forgotten you love so much.

Paul Giamatti in Toronto to promote Editorial Miscellany

Hello LusiFinalBosses. It is yet another Tuesday so it is time for yet another edition of Editorial Miscellany. Yes, that moment when every wide-eyed internet-bumpkin gathers in front of his internet-computer screen and enters Ye Olde Refreshe Browser Code frantically and without pause until I finally post this celebrated and storied column.

This week I played Pokémon X, Tales of Xillia, and …Wii Fit??!!? Oh yes, it is a wonderful week for gaming rambles.

Tales Drops XII, Picks Up XIII

I mentioned last week that the world of Tales of Xillia reminded me of Final Fantasy XII. Not so much the lore and in-game architecture, but rather the way the developers decided to lay out the maps. A traditional overworld is replaced with vast plains of connected maps including areas that appear optional. It is a technique that I adore about XII, and one I certainly appreciate about Xillia although it is not executed with the same level of mastery.

However, the past few hours of gameplay have made this most recent Tales game take on a new sort of imitation. I was not surprised to reach a point at which instant travel was disabled and I was forced to travel in a more linear fashion. It is an old RPG standby at this point to put the blinders on for focused lead-ups to a climactic section of the game, so I was not fazed. However, after one climactic build, another one followed. I finished another isolated section before finishing off yet another boss (while also annoyingly missing half my party) only to find that the tunnel was not finished yet.

Yes, the vast beautiful openness had managed to transition to a Final Fantasy XIII-esque tunnel. It is an homage I am not nearly as fond of, especially when the Xillia battle system – decent as it is – pales in comparison to what is XIII‘s greatest strength. I am currently on the fifth leg of the tunnel and I truly hope it is the final one.

Mantine Cannot Learn Fly?!??!

What the pfargtl? As badass as my Talonflame is, its secondary type is unfortunately redundant. My starter is a dual Psychic/Fire type, and I have no intention to remove him from my party. So when I caught a Mantyke, I became giddy at the thought of finding a cool and powerful replacement that would also take care of the fact that my party is currently missing a Water type.

BUT NOPE.

Mantyke and its evolution Mantine cannot learn the HM Fly despite being half Flying type. It is probably the most trivial thing I have ever complained about (which is saying something), but I am annoyed nonetheless. The search continues.

*Psst*, I hear Ethan uses Wii Fit. Whatta douche!

So… Guys… What Is the Gossip?

Matt Dance suggested that this should become a gossip column. And as we all know, what Matt Dance wants, Matt Dance gets. So… Guys… What is the gossip? Comment below and I will discuss next week. Let us create something out of nothing.

Wait, Wii Fit?

Damn right, Wii Fit! My girlfriend just got benefits, and it turns out that Wii Fit and the balance board is covered, so she bought it and we both started up profiles. I am horrendously out of shape, so while Wii Fit is not going to magically transform me into Jason Derulo, it does feel good to not have “I walk a lot” be my only defense against becoming a giant. And that is important because my hyper-metabolism is also no longer a factor. The personal benefit for using Wii Fit instead of doing normal workouts like normal people, is that I get stats and routines to choose from. If I was by myself in a gym, I would probably do more harm than good. Also, I never want to go to a gym.

From a gamer standpoint, the game is trite and cutesy, but as somebody who would like to be able to live to thirty, it is actually a pretty useful tool. If nothing else, it is the only thing that has ever made me look forward to working out.

Radiant Historia

Where my JRPG lovers at? Have any of you played this? My brother says it is really good, but he also says that Final Fantasy X is amazing, so I want a second opinion. I do not really need to add another RPG to my backlog, but I am addicted to the openings of RPGs.

Well that is it for today. That was my week in the world of gaming. What was yours?

This is a picture of Paul Giamatti. Not Ethos.

Do not ever believe that I am truly gone, LusiSprites. Just when it appeared as though my guest-column stint was over and as all LusiDenizens prepared to breathe a collective sigh of relief, I have returned with a brand new weekly feature! Of course, the term “brand new” is a little massaged, as it is possible that this format is not entirely new to me. Also, this is probably – without resorting to the hyperbolic – my one hundred thousandth time returning to write for the site, so perhaps this was expected after all.

For those who do not follow my every exploit, this new column is meant to be something of a companion piece to our very own SiliconNooB’s distinctive weekly piece. While he editorializes the news to hilarious and devastating effect, my column aims to present “topics of interest” to indulgant and eye-rolling effect. Because by “topic of interest”, I obviously mean “topics of interest to Ethos”. Because that is what I do anyway, so we decided that we might as well harness the narcissism instead of trying to fight it.

But enough preamble, let us dive right in!

Pokémon! Obviously.

While I have been downloading all my Nintendo games recently, the release of Pokémon X and Y is a different beast entirely. Armed with the confidence that I did better than I ever had before in terms of avoiding information about the game, I walked down to the closest EB Games for the midnight launch to pick up two physical copies. I thought it would take me just under thirty minutes, but I underestimated both the busyness of downtown game store locations and the incredible popularity of Pokémon. After being constantly mocked by insecure dudebros on their way to drink their brains out at horrible clubs, the line finally shifted inside the store and I could finally discuss my anticipation with strange nerds in an effort to make the time pass more quickly.

It did not help that EB Games is horrible and used the fact that we were all trapped in a line to make sales pitches to us. I finally left with my copies after two excruciating hours. I say “copies” instead of “copy” because

“Bubble people” only a problem during fade outs

Wind Waker HD Is Baller

For all of their infinitely confusing large-scale decisions, Nintendo continues to produce exceptional software. Wind Waker HD is just a port of sorts, but Nintendo’s attention to detail shines through in Aonuma’s attempt to truly realize his original vision for the title. If nothing else, Wind Waker HD proves that Zelda is a series that would utilize higher power and better resolution better than most others. Too bad that Nintendo itself seems to insist on keeping their technology about a decade behind the times. Anyhoo, I still think Skyward Sword and Majora’s Mask are better, but this version definitely bolsters my opinion of the title.

Tales of Still Not Suck

Graces f was apparently not a one-off. Tales of Xillia has been a surprisingly deep game, both in terms of story and gameplay. Character design and voices are still heavy cause for eye-rolling, but the Final Fantasy XII-esque world and deceptively layered characters make this an extremely promising entry. Perhaps Tales is a series that can grow with its audience, however slowly.

Back to Pokémon! Obviously.

Remember when I mentioned that I picked up two copies at the midnight launch of Pokémon? Well that is because this version was my attempt to get my girlfriend into the series. Despite being a gamer herself, she never really gave the series a true chance. She agreed that she would give the series a proper shake when I said I would buy her a copy. And – of course – the combined power of an already great series with the streamlined opening of X and Y was too much for her and now I have yet another converted Pokémon junkie. Where is my referral cheque?

PS4? More like PSNOPE!

Nothing really to say here except that now that I have the money to get a PS4 on launch day, it is too late to guarantee myself a console. Oh well, I would probably just play Assassin’s Creed on it anyway.

Well folks, that is it! I hope the return of Ethos has been appropriately underwhelming. I will be back next week with another jumbled collection of my gaming thoughts for the week. I will leave you with my final word.

Ethos’ Final Word: Pokémon, doofuses