With the death of Henry Heimlich, inventor of the life-saving manoeuvre after which–in a bizarre temporal inversion–he was named, Lusipurr, SiliconNooB, Adeki, and Sebastian report on the ways in which Nintendo, Square Enix, and Ubisoft have all choked.
By any measure, Final Fantasy XV is one of the most anticipated releases of the year. After ten years in the making by a truly epic development team in terms of size and scope, Lusipurr determines whether the result worth is the price of admission.
Lusipurr.com presents Wielding the Light and the Dark, a Final Fantasy IV playthrough!
Having forgotten fans like Lusipurr and SiliconNooB, Square Enix is overcome by fear: will Persona 5 harm sales of Final Fantasy XV? Will people turn from the gilded baubles of CGI and hold-square-to-win gameplay? ‘Twould be a merry Christmas, indeed!
When Konami headquarters bursts into flames, Lusipurr and SiliconNooB hurry to the scene of the conflagration, where they speculate as to the cause of the blaze, crack jokes, report on Square Enix’s manifold prevarications, and read a book about knights.
Lusipurr and SiliconNooB know what matters to the readers: reviews of bathrobes. Lusipurr previews an upcoming contest and SiliconNooB brings news on the latest re-re-release of Pikmin, before both panelists despair about the lack of quality 3D Mario.
Lusipurr.com is pleased to present Dear Friends: A Final Fantasy V Playthrough!
When SiliconNooB drinks too much Australian Water, he finds himself unable to rise from bed. Heartened by an English test victory, Lusipurr assists his soaked co-host, and Bup joins them with a novel plan to help solve all of Nintendo’s many problems.
When Lusipurr declares war, the site’s giant robots are reactivated and the trench-digging commences. But even exciting Cricket and increased Zestria production are not enough to forestall gloomy news from the Nintendo, Konami, and Square Enix fronts.
Everything is coming up Zestria when SiliconNooB, Bup, and Lusipurr discuss new Lusipurr.com merchandising (including a Schadenfreude Clock, now on sale) and a greater focus on charitable giving (Zestria in very large quantities, shipped by freight).